2 Phrases To Stop Saying

2 Phrases To Stop Saying Flippantly:

1. "I'm sorry." 

2. "You should..."

Before you get all "what the what?" on me (about #1 especially), some background. Responsibility is one of my strengths. Literally. According to the Clifton StrengthsFinder Assessment. Verified by myself and those who know me well.

Having Responsibility as a strength is a double-edged sword sometimes, though, because I find myself feeling in almost every situation that someone HAS to be responsible. And if the people who should be taking or showing responsibility aren't doing so, well then that must mean that I need to. 

Except, wait. No it doesn't.

I'm learning that I need to start allowing myself to only take responsibility for the things I actually should. 

"I'm sorry" is a subtle, but too often employed admission of guilt that has no basis. Do I really need to be sorry that I bumped into you on accident? Or that I had to ask you to repeat what you said? 

 Replace "I'm sorry" with "my mistake" and you have an accurate representation of what's actually happened. 

Yes, I make mistakes. 

I recognize it. I acknowledge it. I correct and reconcile as much as I am able.

I move on.

"You should" gives me the responsibility of pointing another person down a certain path, whether or not they even asked me for directions. 

Change a few parts of speech. 

Make it, "If it were me, I would..." and I leave the responsibility where it truly lies- with the person who will choose for themselves what to do. 

I can't tell you what you should do. I can only tell you what I would do. 

Words have meaning beyond just their face value. It's important that I choose mine to accurately reflect the realities of my situations, and that I am actually aware of what those realities are in the first place. 

What about you? Anything you need to stop saying?